Monday, 12 December 2011

Sec Checks!

When I first came across an E-meter, I was really puzzled. What on earth was that? I saw so many of them at St. Hill and these people seemed to be totally entranced by them. It was really weird. I could not make it out. Nobody outside of Scientology did this, to my knowledge thus far.And that was what made it really weird, who were these people that did this? What made them do it? I did not know. I could not understand what this was all about? I questioned my Father, "what was this all about?" He told me it made people feel better, my next question was "HOW?" I was told it helped people to find answers. "Answers to what?" I don't remember the exact definition but, in my mind the answer was that it was a bit like GOD, in that it could help you define your thoughts, it could read your mind and know what you were thinking, I was about 8 years old at this point.

Now I know most of you were 8 years old at some point in your lives,so you have a machine, the E -meter, the auditor has access to the E-meter and you are holding the cans/ electrodes, whatever?And this machine can read YOUR mind? This may have been simplified to an eight years old understanding. I don't know!But I know this, I took this as an eight year old that this machine could read my mind, just like the GOD that I had learn 't about in school could also. To me as a young child, this E-Meter was like a GOD, it knew my every waking thought. Scary Stuff when you are eight years old.Every thing you think about can be detected by this machine.So I wondered WHY all these adults were constantly connected up to this machine? There were loads of them at St. Hill, always auditing!I did not understand it then and I sure as hell don't understand it now.One day out on the grass between the buildings, where often there were desks and things going on in the summer, my Dad, asked someone to help me understand the E-Meter. I was scared witless.But the man was nice and looked similar to Paul on ESMB, but of course he did not look like that then in the 60s.I even asked Paul, if I knew him, I was so ill when I first went on ESMB. I was so ill when I first went on the internet. It was a stupid move, but I was so desperate, because I had undergone such a drastic, at the time, life threatening change and I felt like my life depended upon it.

It is hard to explain, but Ill try and give a simplified version.

Having been out of all things Scientology since the age of 15, a very weird experience at the age of 19 with my Dad and then a cutting off of ALL ties connected, having read in a newspaper that MarySue Hubbard was convicted of crime, assured that LRH would be also thought that was the end of it. How wrong could I have been?

Wrong. Wrong Wrong!

In about September 2006, went out shopping in Brighton, had a great day and then my world was turned upside down.Saw a good eight to ten people with E-Meters and public peoples holding the cans. Shook me up, knocked me sideways, my head exploded internally. My family wondered what the hell was going on. I was devastated, beyond believe.I truly believed these people had been put out of business and yet here they were, with E-meters.

The last time I had set eyes on an E-Meter was when I was about 14/15, my step mother had tried to get me on it. I refused. I didn't just refuse, I exploded, I told her and the auditor exactly what I thought of their stupid machine that was not GOD and did not know what I thought.I never had contact with her ever again.I would not be subjected to that ever again.

The previous time was a leaving sec check at Abellund, Denmark.

No one has any idea how scared I was. MY life did DEPEND upon it.


YES, I DID, but if I hadn' t of lied I probably wouldn't be here.

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